Speaking only from personal experience, 2024 was looking like a particularly terrible year in terms of entertainment. Sure, there were some blockbusters and some hits on streaming services, but overall, there were more flops than masterpieces. Given that entertainment industries around the world were still reeling from the losses they’d suffered during the COVID-19 pandemic, and had recently been hit by strikes by writers, actors, and animators, I told myself that things could have been a lot worse; we should just enjoy the good things and ignore the rest.
That being said, all of my optimism evaporated the day I learned of the existence of the Umjolo franchise. Not only were The Gone Girl and Day Ones two of the most awful pieces of media I’d seen last year, but also two movies I wouldn’t inflict on my arch-nemesis. And just when I thought I was done with Zuko Nodada’s abominations, I learned that he had a third in the works, titled My Beginning, My End! Well, let’s hope this installment doesn’t spawn three more Umjolo movies and instead buries this Netflix film series six feet under.
Director: Mthunzi Dubazana
Writer: Thuli Zuma
Stars: Yonda Thomas, Londeka Sishi, Nombulelo Mhlongo
Set right after the engagement ceremony in The Gone Girl, Zuko Nodada’s My Beginning, My End! follows Mayi, who is all set to marry Sizwe, the heir to the Jama empire. But, as is usual in these Umjolo movies, while celebrating her 30th birthday with her friend, Mayi falls for a saxophonist named Zweli. She even introduces him to her parents, and it seems like she’s on the verge of calling off her marriage to Sizwe and planning her life with Zweli.
However, her roommate and mother stop Mayi from acting on impulse and advise her to focus on Sizwe and stay away from Zweli. It's easier said than done because Sizwe's mother is a domineering figure and never takes no for an answer, Sizwe's father has gotten the maid pregnant, and Sizwe himself is often unavailable because he's always busy with work. That means Mayi should easily choose Zweli, right? Well, while Mayi is clearly attracted to him, Zweli isn't honest about his past, which is something that stops Mayi from trusting him enough to throw away her future with Sizwe.
Umjolo: My Beginning, My End! is easily the worst of the bunch. Thuli Zuma has written all three films in some capacity (i.e. she's been either the sole screenwriter or the co-writer), and it seems like she's completely given up at this point. In the first film, there was a lot of focus on Lethu's career and how her personal life clashed with her professional life. The second film also devoted a lot of time to Zanele's work. However, when it comes to Mayi, she just exists. Mayi sends money to her family, but we never learn how she earns it. Most of the time she sleeps alone, sleeps with someone, eats with her parents or her in-laws, and that’s it.
Even if there is some passing mention of her source of income, we don’t see it on screen. Mayi’s personality is also absolutely horrendous, and no, she’s not a “flawed character”; it’s simply a reflection of Zuma’s flaws as a writer. We never really get to know why she wants to marry Sizwe or why she’s in love with Zweli. There’s only one line at the beginning of the film that says Mayi falls in love very easily. Why? She never comes across as a person who is overflowing with affection, so she’s left with no choice but to distribute her emotions between two men. In fact, she seems like the fictional version of those women that men conjure up in their heads to feed their misogyny. It’s a shame that Mayi is written by a woman. And if this is the status of the protagonist, one can only imagine how poorly the rest of the characters have been created.
The thing about movies like My Beginning, My End! is that they are not fun to analyze. I mean, why should I sit here and dissect script structure, themes, character decisions and more in excruciating detail when the writers, director and the rest of the crew have given no thought to the making of the film? One scene flows into another in the most jarring and random way possible. The word “cinematography” does not exist in the vocabulary of anyone associated with this film. The music is so random. The film itself has nothing relevant to say. And if anyone refutes that last statement by saying that I should acknowledge this film’s attempt to question traditionalism by preventing a man from marrying his brother’s widow, I will take that as an invitation to a fistfight.
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